Make-up Sex, Dirty Talk, and More: Tips for Hotter Sex with an Ex

Make-up sex can be incredibly hot and hard to resist. Just look at this email I recently received from one of my clients. We’ll call her G.

“My ex and I have recently been talking, and both admitted to being unsatisfied with foreplay and sex with each other. So we’ve decided to give it one last chance. I need any and all suggestions. We want to make it kinky, romantic, fun and enjoyable for both of us. Anything that drives guys crazy, I want to hear. I also need to know some tips on how to relax; I’m too worried about doing everything right that I’m afraid I’m not getting into it myself as much as I should. I want to make this the most amazing night.”

Do you resonate with what G is asking? Then keep reading!

This blog post will share tips for hotter and happier make-up sex with your partner. Whether you’re looking to explore new sexual behaviors, learn from the pros, or relax and enjoy the moment, these tips will help you take your sex life to the next level. So, let’s dive in!

Honesty is Key

Sex is a natural and vital aspect of our lives but can also be complex and challenging. We all have different desires, needs, and preferences around intimacy, and it’s not always easy to communicate them with our partners.

But, before you delve into intimacy with an ex-partner, addressing the underlying issues leading to the breakup is essential. Have an honest conversation about what didn’t work in the past and identify what you both want and need moving forward. This will set the foundation for a more fulfilling sexual experience.

It’s crucial to create a safe and non-judgmental space where you both feel comfortable expressing your thoughts and feelings. This means listening actively, avoiding criticism or blame, and approaching the conversation with empathy and understanding. Remember, the goal is not to rehash old wounds but to find a way forward that works for both of you.

Once you’ve addressed the emotional aspects of your relationship, it’s time to get down to the nitty-gritty of what you want in the bedroom. Be specific about your desires and fantasies, and encourage your partner to do the same. This could include anything from trying new positions to incorporating toys or role-play into your lovemaking.

Learning from the Pros

Erotic teaching and women-friendly erotic videos can be great resources for couples exploring new sexual behaviors. Nina Hartley’s video series and Candida Royalle’s films were the go-to erotica in their day. Today there are many other hubs where you can find ethical, erotic entertainment. Shop around. They should offer guidance and role models for sexually assertive women who want to talk dirty with their partners. These can serve as a starting point for developing your own style and preferences.

Watching erotic content together can be a great way to spark inspiration and get the conversation flowing. It can also help you both feel more comfortable exploring new things in the bedroom. Just remember to choose content that aligns with your values and makes you both feel safe and respected.

In addition to visual aids, consider reading erotic literature or attending workshops or events focused on sexual exploration. The more you educate yourself about the wide world of sexual possibilities, the more confident and empowered you’ll feel in your own sexuality.

Relax and Enjoy

Getting caught up in the pressure of trying to do everything right in bed is easy. However, it’s important to remember that sex is about pleasure and enjoyment. Take deep breaths, let go of your fears and worries, and focus on the sensations and connection between you and your partner. Say positive affirmations to yourself and fully immerse yourself in the moment.

One way to reduce performance anxiety is to take the focus off of orgasm and instead prioritize pleasure and exploration. This means taking your time, savoring each touch and sensation, and allowing yourself to get lost in the experience.

It can also be helpful to incorporate mindfulness practices into your sex life. This could include deep breathing exercises, meditation, or simply taking a few moments to check in with your body and emotions before and during sex.

Remember, there’s no right or wrong way to have sex. What matters most is that you and your partner are both enjoying yourselves and feeling connected to each other.

Ready to take your sex life to the next level?

Book a complimentary sex coaching intake call with me, the Mother of Sex Coaching, right here. You’ll get personalized advice and guidance on improving your sexual experiences. Don’t let your inhibitions keep you from experiencing the pleasure you deserve.

With a little bit of honesty, education, and relaxation, you and your partner can create a make-up sex experience that’s truly unforgettable. So go ahead and let yourself get lost in the moment – you might just be surprised at what you discover about yourself and your relationship in the process.

Dr. Patti Britton

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