Sexual Frequency in Marriages Over 50

Sexual frequency

As a sex coach with decades of experience, I’m often asked about sexual frequency in marriages. One question repeatedly arises: “How often do 50-year-old married couples make love?”

I spoke about this in an article for Age Times recently.

It’s a common misconception that sex stops being necessary after a certain age. Still, sexual expression can be just as fulfilling and necessary at age 50 as at age 20. However, the frequency of sex can vary significantly from couple to couple, depending on various factors such as health, work schedules, and communication.

If you find yourself in a sexless marriage, know that you’re not alone.

Many couples go through periods where sex takes a backseat to other responsibilities. Still, it’s important to remember that a fulfilling sex life is vital to a healthy relationship.

So, how often should you be having sex?

The answer is simple: no “right” or “wrong” amount exists. Some couples may make love several times a week, while others may be content with once a month or even less. What’s most important is that you are both on the same page and feel satisfied with the frequency and quality of your sexual interactions.

If you’re in a sexless marriage and feeling stuck, addressing the underlying issues contributing to your lack of intimacy is essential. This could include communication breakdowns, resentment, boredom, or health issues.

Seeking the guidance of a certified sex coach can be tremendously helpful in navigating these challenges and finding ways to reignite the spark in your relationship.

Remember, sexuality is vital to your overall well-being, and it’s never too late to start exploring and experimenting.

Keep yourself sexually alive throughout your lifetime, and don’t be afraid to try new things.

With a little bit of patience, communication, and creativity, you and your partner can enjoy a fulfilling and exciting sex life, regardless of your age or relationship status.

Are you ready to take your sex life to the next level? What’s one new thing you can try with your partner to reignite the spark in your relationship? Share your thoughts in the comments below and let’s keep the conversation going!

Healing After Infidelity

Healing after infidelity

Infidelity can be a devastating blow to any relationship, leaving partners wondering how to move forward and rebuild trust. If you’re struggling with the aftermath of an affair, know that you’re not alone – and that healing is possible.

Last year, one of my clients, we’ll call her N, discovered that her husband was having an online affair. Yikes!

While no physical contact was involved, the emotional pain that infidelity can cause is just as real. And after her husband went through counseling and started taking an antidepressant, N’s next question was, “what now?”

Specifically, she wanted to know what she could do to rebuild trust and intimacy in their relationship and how to forget about the affair.

If you find yourself in the same position as N, here’s my advice.

It can happen to anyone

Take a deep breath. You’re not alone. Infidelity is, unfortunately common, and it can happen to anyone.

I also want to acknowledge that this situation is difficult and has no one-size-fits-all solution. However, I do have a few tips that might help.

Healing from an affair is a long-term process, so don’t expect everything to be fixed overnight.

One of my go-to resources for healing after infidelity is the book After the Affair by Janis Abrahms and Michael Spring. This book provides insight into how to recover from the pain and betrayal of infidelity and how to rebuild trust.

I was glad to hear that N’s partner sought counseling after the affair. I recommend that both partners do this. That can help partners understand the underlying issues that led to the infidelity so they can work on those issues together. Having an outside ally can be incredibly helpful during this time.

Now, let’s talk about antidepressants. This medication can be a real lifesaver for people struggling with depression and anxiety. However, it can also cause sexual side effects like low libido and difficulty with orgasms.

If your partner is experiencing these side effects, they must talk to their doctor. Then, they may be able to switch to a different medication that doesn’t have these side effects or add in a mitigating medication.

Here’s one negative fallout of infidelity that surprises many couples: it can be that magical wake-up call to get your sexual relationship back on track! So, sometimes what seems like a bad thing turns out to be the gift that keeps on giving.

Finally, I want to remind you that taking care of yourself is important during this time. Celebrate your own sexuality in ways that make you feel good. For example, buy yourself some sexy lingerie, go to a day spa, or take some time to masturbate.

Whatever makes you feel alive and vibrant in the sex department, go for it! And when you’re ready, don’t be afraid to seek a sexologist who can help get you and your partner back on track.

Remember, you’re not alone in this. Healing from infidelity takes time, but it is possible. So stay strong, take care of yourself, and don’t be afraid to seek help when needed. Get in touch today to learn how you can restore your relationship and move forward after an affair.

How to Have Stronger Orgasms

stronger orgasms

Are you tired of chasing the elusive ‘Big O’ and never quite reaching that peak of pleasure? Well, fear not, because today we will explore the secrets to having stronger and more satisfying orgasms.

You know, that feeling of pure bliss and release we all crave during sex? Well, what happens when it’s not quite strong enough? Fear not because I’m here to help.

First and foremost, let’s establish that YOU are responsible for your own orgasm. That’s right. It’s up to you to know your own body and what it needs to reach that pinnacle of pleasure.

Communication is essential!

That being said, it’s important to communicate with your partner about your desires and needs for sexual attention. I’m sure your partner wants to please you, too!

One key to a stronger orgasm is building up tension and anticipation through plenty of foreplay. This can include romantic talk, gentle caressing, deep tongue kissing, breast fondling, and all the other lovely (or “nasty”) things that get you in the mood.

And let’s not forget the power of oral sex! It’s not just foreplay. It’s sex in its own right.

But it’s not just about physical stimulation. Adding a touch of love and emotional connection can make a big difference, too.

Remember, sex is like electricity, and your body is the transformer. So if the sexual charge doesn’t build up enough, the orgasmic release won’t be as strong as it could be.

Ready to take your sexual experience to the next level? Book a call with a me today and discover personalized strategies for stronger, more satisfying orgasms. Don’t wait – start your journey towards sexual fulfillment now!

Understanding Sexual Flush

sexual flush

Have you ever experienced a sudden rush of heat and redness during or after sex? Don’t worry; it’s probably sexual flush and it’s entirely natural!

Recently, a client of mine, D, asked me if she was allergic to sex due to a rash she noticed on her neck and chest during a sexual encounter. However, what D experienced was not an allergic reaction but a sexual flush, a typical bodily response to sexual stimulation. In this blog post, we’ll delve deeper into the sexual response cycle and explain why sexual flush is nothing to be worried about.

During our consultation, D explained that she noticed little red splotches on the right side of her neck that went down to her chest, which she found bothersome. Her boyfriend found it cute, but D was still worried about it. So, what’s going on here?

A natural part of the sexual response cycle

Well, my friends, let me introduce you to a natural part of the sexual response cycle: sexual flush. This is what D experienced during sex. Sexual flush is a typical bodily response in some people more prominently than others. It’s a sign that your body is functioning correctly and reacting to sexual stimulation.

The sexual response cycle has several phases, from “vague stirring” or attraction to the final resolution phase. During the excitement and plateau phases, the body experiences heat throughout, especially in the groin area, and other physical signs such as wetness, color changes in the genitals, swelling of the vulva tissue, breast swelling, and nipple erection.

At orgasm, the body experiences a release of sexual tension, including rapid and heavy breathing, darkening of the genitals, opening of the vaginal canal, increased sensations, wetness, and sometimes curling of the toes, and the spread of a sexual flush.

So, dear readers, if you experience a sexual flush during sex, don’t fret.

It’s completely normal and a sign that your body is functioning properly. So instead of viewing it as a nuisance, try to embrace it as a pleasurable ending to sex. This phenomenon could also have led to folks saying, “I’m so hot for you!” Just saying.

Remember, sex is a beautiful and natural part of life, and there is no need to feel ashamed or embarrassed about your body’s responses.

I hope this information has uplifted and empowered you to embrace your sexual self.

So, embrace your sexual self and enjoy the beautiful and natural experience of sex, including the wonderful sexual flush. If you have any concerns or questions I’m here to support you. Remember, you deserve to have a fulfilling and satisfying sex life. Now, go out there and have fun!